I give up. There is no we we will ever be close. There is no way that he will ever love me. I have been trying so hard to form a relationship with him but he just dislikes me to much. I am not real sure what I did to make him feel such anger towards me but it must have been something. It hurts so bad knowing how he feels about me. Sometimes I just go to my room and cry. Every once in a while he will come in and say he is sorry and tell me he loves me, I will get my hopes up that things will change, then a few days later it just all happens again. This time we were good for a few months, then next thing I know my world comes tumbling down. How do I handle knowing that someone I love so much hates me so much. I pray and I pray and I try to hand it over to God, but the way he is just hurts so bad that there are times that I dont know if I can go on. His girlfriends mom called me the other night to tell me that I am a bad mom, that hit a sore spot. I wanted so much for him to take up for me. Then tonight he pretty much said that I am a bad mother. Maybe if so many people are saying it, it is true. Being a good mom to my children has always been so important, them having happy childhoods means everything to me. If I am failing them I dont know what to do. I am trying so hard. I am being the best mom I know how to be. Maybe that is just not good enough. It hurts so so bad to know that its just not good enough. My kids are so great they deserve better than I am doing.